I've been in this country for just under two weeks now and in less than 48 hours I will be on a plane heading back over the Pacific Ocean to my beautiful home state of Oregon.
I don't want to go back.
I do, but I don't.
This always happens when I travel anywhere, even in the states. I never want to go back home. I fall in love with people and places and cultures and ways of speaking and living wherever I go and I hate leaving it behind.
That's ok, right?
Sure it is, but that's not usually the only reason I don't want to go back home.
As I'm sitting here in this hotel with WiFi, I'm checking emails and Facebook, seeing what I've missed while in the other side of the world. And as I'm using my handy dandy little iPad to browse my social media, I realize something...
I don't miss it at all.
Yes, of course I miss my friends and family. And don't get me wrong, I have a great and amazing life in the States! I have people who know me and love me and support me, I have work, I have ministry, I have things to do. There are people that I know and love and miss and there are things I love to do and be back home.
But here, on the other side of the world, I gain such a different perspective.
I realize what a rat race culture I live in. I realize what a media-driven culture I live in. I realize how social media and busyness are rulers in not just my culture, but my life. And here, on the other side of the world, I don't miss it at all.
I don't miss drama and busyness and people who don't look you in the eye. I don't miss everyone being on their smartphones all the time. I don't miss being on my iPad all the time! I don't miss my phone or the million things demanding my attention every day. I don't miss social media. I don't miss entertainment or our "please-me, make-me-happy" mindset-driven culture.
I don't miss a lot of things.
And yet, as I travel, I know that every place I visit has its things that are wrong. There are issues everywhere. And I know, that anywhere I settle – any state, any country – is going to have things I wouldn't miss if I were to leave it for a time. And I realize, I really am blessed to live where I do. Like I said, my life really is amazing. I live in a beautiful state, I am provided for abundantly, I have everything I need, I have amazing people in my life, I have amazing opportunities to do amazing things...
And I have a chance to make a difference.
Every time I travel, I change a little. A difference is made in me. I gain different perspective. And wherever I go, I have the chance to do missions. I have the chance to meet people, make choices, make a difference. I have the chance to learn from other cultures and then to take what I've learned back to my own.
Because every place does have its issues. We live in a fallen world, after all, and that's a universal thing!
SO! When I get back to the States, my goal is to do life a little bit differently. What will that look like? I'm not sure yet. I'm still processing that, so I guess that's a topic for another day. But I've tasted another culture and I've seen the pros and cons of my own. I've fallen in love with more people around the world and I'm returning with a larger heart to love even more the people I have at home.
I do want to go home. It's where I'm from, it's where my story originated and it's the place I have the most permission to make a difference in. It's where my roots are, where my people are, where jobs and missions are still for me. It's where my calling still is, where I'm still supposed to be.
See you soon Eugene :)
